I’m Listening Lord…

I’ve fallen down on my “job” of blogging the past week and half. I felt I had nothing to contribute, and quite frankly I was so confused I didn’t know what to say. I have been trying my best to lead a more positive life, and release the negativity that’s been pulling me under. Lately the negativity has been winning the battle.

A negative mind will never give you a positive life #Quote #Positivity #Inspiration:

It seems as if my decision to be more positive has only created more negativity. Unfortunately when I begin to feel overwhelmed, I retreat. Silence becomes my shield to protect my mind and let it restore itself.

Sometimes, it feels better not to talk. At all. About anything. To anyone. —via http://ift.tt/2eY7hg4:

I also use my periods of silence to talk to God. I’ve never really referred to my conversations with God as prayers, being as growing up I felt as if prayers were more formal. Sometimes I just need to talk to God as if he were sitting right next to me, and lately He seems to be communicating back pretty loudly.

Pray without ceasing. Some think that literally means to pray all day long, but I think you just need to be in a continual state of worship to Him. It doesn't have to be verbal or even thought. It could be sitting under the shade of a tree. It could be painting. It could be running. It could be being with your besties. I think it just needs to be whatever makes you feel that you're glorifying Him and what makes you feel closest to your Maker.:

I love my radio on my morning drives in to work. There is nothing that relieves my stress like good music can, but this past week the music has been M.I.A. So I spend most of my ride surfing the channels, and this morning a preacher caught my attention with just one word…”Resentment”.

Image result for what did you say gif

Yes, the word “resentment” caught my attention because it’s exactly what I have been dealing with lately. So I listened. The preacher went on to talk on forgiveness, and how God is a forgiving God. How resentment destroys your chance at peace. This preacher really had my attention now! I listened some more, and then he asked this…

“What price does a person pay to hold resentment in their heart?”

I knew right then and there that God meant for me to hear this question. I have been feeling like He was trying to send me a message, but that one question made it crystal clear.

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My heart crumbled at that question. How long am I willing to hold resentment in my heart? How much more am I willing to lose because of resentment? How much more am I willing to miss out on because of resentment? Scars from the past, open wounds from the past and present, are contributing to the resentment I feel on a daily basis. I can’t go on like this. I have to forgive, no matter how hard it may be, I have to forgive to find that happiness I so desperately want.

So many times in my life God has been there for me, and yet when things are going good, or I get overwhelmed by life, I tend to overlook Him. I tend to think that I can handle things on my own in every aspect of my life, but I can’t.

I was baptized at age 18, one week after my mom died. Over the years, I have wandered to and from God. I have been angry at Him, I have cried to Him, and I have questioned Him. Still yet He has remained by my side waiting for me to return to Him…waiting for me to give up my control that I hold onto so tightly.

Feeling like I could control things was how I felt I had made it through life, when in all reality, I didn’t have control over a single thing. God is how I made it. His plans were for me to go through the things that I did. I didn’t have any control over those things, I only thought I did.

This is what God is teaching me right now. At first, I was angry that he changed my plans, but I'm learning that his plans are always better than mine. How could a finite mind come up with a greater plan for the future than an infinite one?:

This week He has been reassuring me that I have not been alone. One of my greatest trials has been accepting being alone. He has been there the entire time. At Christmas, I decided to “Be the Good” and I paid the admission for the next car in line to come in and enjoy the Christmas lights I had taken my girls to see. I left a card wishing them a Merry Christmas and hoped that they would also “Be the Good” that this world so needed. I never expected that act of kindness to come back to me because I had lost faith, but I was still clinging to hope. Here it is March and someone backed into my car while it was parked at work. I stepped down to my car to find my reflector and a note on my windshield with a phone number and an apology. The person returned after running to a quick appointment, filed a report, and gave me their insurance information. This person was so thankful for my kindness, and not being mad at them for hitting my car….and that’s when I heard Him speaking to me. This person said “I always try to do what is right, and BE THE GOOD.” I went back to my office and cried.

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Thank you for listening to me. I leave you with some pieces of inspiration, as we never know what the next person may be seeking.

 Anxiety is real, and if you've found yourself in the grips of it, you are certainly not alone. In fact, about 40 million adults in the U.S. suffer from an anxiety disorder. The good news is, with the right help, therapy and treatment can soon bring signs of recovery. Whether you're experiencing an episode of anxiety in this season or it has been an ongoing battle, here are 19 quotes to encourage your spirit.       &nbs...:

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Jesus is the missing piece in your life.:

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